200 anniversary wishes, by who's writing

Harry Truman's best anniversary note barely has sentences in it. In 1957 he wrote Bess a line for every year of their marriage: "Broke and in a bad way" for 1922, "Out of a job" for 1925, "All cut up but still happy" for 1955. He ended on "Only 37 to go for the diamond jubilee!" Nobody could have sent that letter to anyone else, and that's what most anniversary cards are missing.

Lists like this one can supply the warm sentence. They can't supply the detail. So take any wish below as a start, and add the one thing that happened to the two of you. For a couple you know less well, a plain, kind line is enough, and there's a section for that too.

What do you write in an anniversary card?

Write one specific thing from this year, what it showed you, and something you're looking forward to. People cut the specific line because it feels like too much, and that's usually a misjudgment. In experiments published in Psychological Science, Amit Kumar and Nicholas Epley had people write gratitude letters. The writers overestimated how awkward the recipients would feel and underestimated how good they'd feel. Those letters weren't anniversary cards and the writers weren't all spouses, but the mistake is the same one.

Why does a real memory work better than a compliment?

Naming a real memory has some support of its own. In a study of 129 younger and older adults, Nicole Alea and Susan Bluck found that people felt warmer toward a partner after recalling a real event from the relationship. That was measured right after the recall, and not over years. A month-long experiment with 47 couples adds a limit: assigning people to express gratitude changed little by itself, and those who saw their partner as responsive did better. A card won't fix anything. It's a good place to say a true thing.

What does a good anniversary message look like?

Here's what the three parts look like from different writers:

• To a spouse: You drove to Tulsa and back in one day when Dad got sick. I've never felt so looked after. Next year, let's go somewhere with no hospitals in it.
• To your parents: You still dance in the kitchen when you think nobody's home. I've started doing it too. Save us two seats at Christmas.
• To friends: You fed us for a week when the baby came. We've told everyone. The next dinner's on us.

Hallmark's writers add a test worth using: read it out loud, and if you wouldn't say it that way, change it. Writing to someone else's marriage, Hallmark Canada says to avoid comments that get too far inside it. That rules out most advice and any mention of how hard it must be to live with them, unless you're family and everyone's laughing.

Fill-in starters

Put a fact in the blank, not an adjective. "This year you sat with my mother every Thursday" will mean more than "this year you were wonderful."

• This year you ___. I saw it, and I haven't stopped thinking about it. Happy anniversary.
• My favorite thing we did this year was ___. Let's do it again before the next card.
• What I know now that I didn't know on our wedding day: ___.
• ___ years ago I thought I knew you. Today I found out you ___. Happy anniversary.
• You two taught me ___ just by ___. Happy anniversary.
• Truman's version: write the year, then one line about it. Do as many years as you've got.

Which wish fits who's writing and which year?

Find your row, then write about what's in the column. The name in the first column jumps to the wishes, and the by-year section has lines for each milestone.

Anniversary wishes for your husband

These work for any husband, from a wife or from a husband. The ones with a blank are the strongest: fill it with something from this year and the card stops being a card anybody could buy.

• Happy anniversary to the man who still walks on the traffic side of the sidewalk.
• You've fixed the same leaky faucet three times now, and I'd marry you for the fourth. Happy anniversary.
• At every party, I know where you are without looking. Happy anniversary.
• You're the only person I've ever wanted to tell the boring parts to. Happy anniversary, my love.
• You make the coffee before I'm up and you've never once mentioned it. I've been meaning to. Happy anniversary.
• Happy anniversary to my husband, who can find anything in this house except the laundry basket.
• I knew you'd be a good husband. I didn't know you'd be this much fun at the grocery store. Happy anniversary.
• The best decision I ever made took about four seconds. Thank you for asking. Happy anniversary.
• Every year I find one more thing I didn't know about you. This year it was ___. Keep them coming.
• You held my hand through ___ and you never asked me to be fine before I was. Happy anniversary.
• Happy anniversary to the one person who laughs at my jokes before I get to the end of them.
• People ask how we make it work. I tell them you do most of it and I try to stay out of the way. Happy anniversary.
• Good news, bad news, a strange noise from the car: you get the call. Happy anniversary.
• You've seen me before 7 a.m. for years now, and you still bring me toast. Happy anniversary.
• Happy anniversary, husband. I still like saying that word.
• I married you for your smile. I stay for the way you talk to waiters.
• I've liked a lot of places. I've never once been sorry to leave one and come back to you. Happy anniversary.
• Here's to the years we planned, and to the better ones we got instead. Happy anniversary.

Anniversary wishes for your wife

These work for any wife, from a husband or from a wife. If you're not a natural card writer, pick a plain one and add a line about something she did this year that she thinks you missed.

• Happy anniversary to my wife, who still makes me want to clean the house before she gets home.
• You're still the only person whose opinion of my sweater I actually take. Happy anniversary.
• You remember every birthday, every allergy and every name at the party. I remember where we parked. Happy anniversary.
• I told everyone I was lucky the day you said yes. I've got a lot more evidence now. Happy anniversary.
• Happy anniversary to the woman who can read my mood from the sound of my keys in the door.
• I found one of your old grocery lists in a coat pocket, and I kept it. Happy anniversary.
• This year you ___, and you did it without telling anyone. I'm telling you I saw it. Happy anniversary.
• You've rescued me from every bad dinner party with one look across the table. Happy anniversary.
• You're the reason this house feels like somebody lives here on purpose. Happy anniversary.
• I wasn't much of a catch when we met. You saw what I could be, and then you stuck around to help. Happy anniversary.
• If I could tell my younger self one thing on our wedding day, it would be: she's right about the ___, just do what she says.
• I still stop talking when you walk in. You've noticed.
• A quiet night on the couch with you still beats most of the places I've been. Happy anniversary.
• You treat me like someone who can handle it, and then I find out I can. Happy anniversary.
• Every good plan I've ever had has your handwriting in the margins. Happy anniversary, my love.
• I'm kinder than I was the day we met, and I know exactly who to thank. Happy anniversary.
• You've been my wife for ___ years, and I'm still trying to impress you. Happy anniversary.
• Thank you for every time you waited until we'd parked to say I told you so. Happy anniversary.

Anniversary wishes when you have kids at home

With small kids in the house, romance is mostly logistics, and saying so in the card is often the most romantic thing available. These are for either of you to write.

• We haven't finished a sentence since ___ was born, but I know how this one ends: I love you. Happy anniversary.
• Happy anniversary. Tonight we eat something nobody has to cut into pieces.
• When one of the kids says something ridiculous, you're who I look at. Happy anniversary.
• I fell in love with you, and then I watched you teach a small person to tie a shoe. That was the second time. Happy anniversary.
• Romance at our house is you taking the early shift so I can sleep. Happy anniversary.
• Someday this house will be quiet and we'll have to talk to each other. I can't wait.

Anniversary wishes after a hard year

After a hard year, say the year was hard and say who you're glad you had for it. Don't promise that it happened for a reason. These cover illness, money, distance and the kind of year you can't sum up, and the last two are for writing to someone else.

• This year was hard, and you were here for every day of it. Happy anniversary.
• We didn't get much right this year except staying on the same side. That's the part I care about. Happy anniversary.
• I don't need this year to have meant anything. I'm just glad I had you next to me for it.
• You drove me to every appointment and made me laugh in most of the waiting rooms. Happy anniversary.
• We've had better years, and I wouldn't trade who I had this one with.
• I know you're tired. I'm tired. I love you anyway, and I think that counts for a lot. Happy anniversary.
• To a couple going through it: We've seen how you've looked after each other this year. We're thinking of you both today.
• To someone widowed, on what would have been the day: I know what today is. I remember ___ dancing with you at the wedding, and I always will.

For a partner you haven't married yet

Search for anniversary wishes and most of what comes back assumes a wedding. These don't, and they work for a first year or a tenth.

• ___ ago I was trying to act normal around you. I've stopped trying. Happy anniversary.
• Most of my favorite photos from this year have you in them, and you took the rest. Happy anniversary.
• Happy anniversary. I keep telling people about you, and they keep asking me to stop.
• You know my coffee order and my worst habit, and you came back anyway. Happy anniversary.

Anniversary wishes for a son and daughter-in-law

A parent's anniversary card has one job the other cards don't: telling the in-law they're family. Say it to them by name. Swap son and daughter, in-law and all, wherever you need to, including for a son and son-in-law or a daughter and daughter-in-law. Keep advice out of it unless they asked.

• Happy anniversary to our son and to ___, whose side we now take in most things.
• We thought our table was full. Then our daughter came home with ___, and it got better. Happy anniversary.
• We watched you make that promise on your wedding day, and we've watched you keep it on a lot of ordinary days since. Happy anniversary.
• We love hearing how you two talk to each other. You're better at it than we were at your age. Happy anniversary.
• ___, you've been very good to our son, and we see it. Happy anniversary to you both.
• If there are grandkids: Watching you two raise those kids is the great pleasure of our retirement. Happy anniversary.
• Happy anniversary, you two. Dinner's at our house whenever you want a night off.
• We gave you advice on your wedding day. Looking at you now, you should have been giving it to us. Happy anniversary.
• No mother-in-law jokes here. I got very lucky with you, ___. Happy anniversary to you both.
• From Dad: I don't write much in cards. I like the way you look after each other. Happy anniversary.
• From Mom: I still have the ___ from your wedding in my top drawer. Some days I take it out. Happy anniversary.
• We remember the first apartment. You've come a long way from that couch. Happy anniversary.
• You've never once needed us to take sides, and that's all a parent could ask for. Happy anniversary.
• We pray for you both every morning, and today we'll add an extra thank you. Happy anniversary.

Anniversary wishes for your parents (mom and dad)

You watched this marriage from the inside, so use that. The best cards to parents name a small habit you saw growing up, which they probably don't know you noticed.

• Happy anniversary, Mom and Dad. You made marriage look so normal that it took me years to see how much work it was.
• Everything I know about staying came from watching you two at the kitchen table. Happy anniversary.
• Thanks for getting married. I have a personal interest in how that worked out.
• You two still bicker about the right way to cut a melon, and I hope you never stop. Happy anniversary.
• I've started saying things the way you say them to each other. My spouse would like a word with you. Happy anniversary.
• When I was small I thought you two were just how the world worked. I know better now, and I'm more grateful. Happy anniversary.
• ___ years, ___ kids, ___ houses, one very patient marriage. Happy anniversary, Mom and Dad.
• From a daughter: Dad, the way you look at Mom set a high bar, and I held everyone I ever dated to it. Happy anniversary.
• From a daughter: Mom, I call you about my marriage because I've watched yours. Happy anniversary to you both.
• From a son: I learned how to treat a person by watching how Dad treats you, Mom. Happy anniversary.
• From a son: You two did a good job, and I'll deny writing this if it comes up at dinner.
• To a stepparent: You married Mom and got all of us thrown in, and you've never acted like that was the catch. Happy anniversary.
• To a parent and stepparent: Thank you for making our dad laugh again. Happy anniversary to you both.
• We've all been counting on you two longer than we realized. Happy anniversary.
• From all the kids: We're taking you to dinner, and this time nobody's ordering off the kids' menu. Happy anniversary.
• Now that I'm married myself, I'd like to apologize for thinking you two were boring. You were busy.

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Anniversary wishes for grandparents

A grandparent will keep this card for years. Get a child to write one, if you've got one around, or use the anniversary as an excuse to ask how they met. Our 165 questions to ask your grandparents can take it from there.

• Grandma and Grandpa, I've never known a world without you two in it. Happy anniversary.
• Your house smells the same as it did when I was four, and you still hold hands in the car. Happy anniversary.
• You were married before my mom was born, and she still thinks she knows everything about you. Happy anniversary.
• From the grandkids: we counted, and there are ___ of us. That's your fault. Happy anniversary.
• I brought ___ to meet you first so they could see what I was hoping for. Happy anniversary.
• For a child to write: How did you stay married so long? I can't even stay in my chair. Happy anniversary!
• Tell me again how you met. I know the story. I want to hear you argue about the details. Happy anniversary.
• You taught me to play cards, and you taught me that two people can disagree about the rules for decades. Happy anniversary.

Anniversary wishes for your mother-in-law and father-in-law

Warm and a little formal is the right register here. Thank them for something specific, which is usually the person you married or the way they let you in.

• You raised the person I married, and you showed them what a marriage looks like. I've benefited from both. Happy anniversary.
• Thank you for welcoming me into a family that already had its own jokes. Happy anniversary.
• ___ talks about your marriage the way other people talk about their home team. Happy anniversary.
• I took notes at your table the first time I came to dinner. I still use them. Happy anniversary.
• ___ got the best of you both, and I get to live with it. Happy anniversary.
• Wishing you both a very happy anniversary. We feel lucky to be part of the family you started.

Anniversary wishes for a brother or sister and their spouse

You knew your sibling before they were any good at this. Tease your sibling and be kind to the spouse.

• Happy anniversary to my sister and the only person who can get her to leave on time.
• Happy anniversary to my brother and the person who finally taught him to call back.
• To a brother's spouse: I shared a bedroom with him for fifteen years, so I know exactly what you've put up with. Happy anniversary.
• You two are the first house I call when the car breaks down and the last one I want to leave on holidays. Happy anniversary.
• To my sister: I told you so the day you met, and I was right. Happy anniversary.
• To my sister-in-law: I always wanted a sister who laughed at my brother. Happy anniversary.
• To my brother-in-law: You've been in this family long enough to know which uncle not to ask about politics. Happy anniversary.
• My parents ask about you first when I call, and I've made peace with it. Happy anniversary.
• My kids think your house is the fun one, and they're right. Happy anniversary.
• Growing up, I never would have guessed you'd be this good at being someone's husband. I'm happy to be wrong.
• My toast at your wedding predicted this. I'd like some credit.
• Love from the sibling who has seen the baby pictures. Keep being good to each other. Happy anniversary.

Anniversary wishes for friends

Friends get to be funny and a little sentimental in the same card. Mention the wedding if you were at it, or the first time you met them as a couple if you weren't.

• We've watched you two host, move, argue about the route and laugh about it later. Happy anniversary.
• You're the couple we quote when we're trying to settle something. Happy anniversary.
• I introduced you two, mostly so I'd have someone to sit with. That plan failed. Happy anniversary.
• From the one who stood up next to you that day: I'd do it again, and this time I'd give a shorter speech.
• To a best friend: You've been happier these ___ years than in all the years I knew you before, and I knew you well. Happy anniversary.
• Your kitchen has heard all of our best conversations. Happy anniversary to the two people who keep feeding us.
• Every time we leave your house, we drive home nicer to each other. Happy anniversary.
• Happy anniversary to two people who've talked several of us into getting married, just by having us over.
• Your wedding is still the best party we've been to, and your marriage is better.
• I don't know how you two do it, and I've watched closely. Happy anniversary.
• For the group chat: Happy anniversary to the only two in here who have their lives together.
• Too many miles from your table this year. Raising a glass to you both from here. Happy anniversary.

Anniversary wishes for a coworker, boss or neighbor

Say congratulations, add the number if you know it, and stop. With a boss, the safest wish is short and leaves their marriage out of it. These are for wedding anniversaries, not work ones.

• Congratulations on your anniversary. I hope you get out of here early today.
• Happy anniversary to you and ___. Wishing you both a lovely evening.
• Congratulations on ___ years. That's a lot to be proud of.
• I heard it's your anniversary today. Congratulations to you both, and I hope it's a good one.
• Wishing you and ___ a happy anniversary and a quiet inbox.
• To neighbors: We've enjoyed seeing you two out on your walks all these years. Happy anniversary from across the street.
• To neighbors: You've taken in our packages for years and never asked what's in them. Congratulations on the anniversary.
• From the whole team: Congratulations on your anniversary from all of us. The meeting can wait.

Short anniversary wishes

A short anniversary wish needs a single idea, and it works in a text, on a gift tag or under a printed verse. The first six are for a spouse and the rest for a couple.

• Happy anniversary, my favorite decision.
• Still your ride home. Happy anniversary.
• You again. Good. Happy anniversary.
• More of this, please. Happy anniversary.
• Thanks for staying. Happy anniversary.
• Happy anniversary. Let's keep going.
• Good pick, both of you. Happy anniversary.
• Have a very good day, both of you, and leave the dishes in the sink.
• Happy anniversary, you two. Stay exactly like this.
• Congratulations on another year. You two still seem pleased about it.

Funny anniversary wishes

Clean funny works best: tease the small habits, like directions and dinner, and leave out the big ones, like who's tired of whom. Pepys gets the last one, and you can read his original further down.

• You still think I'm funny, and I've decided not to question it.
• I've now spent more of my life hearing about your cousin's boat than I ever planned to. Happy anniversary.
• We've agreed on a restaurant ___ times in ___ years. Here's to one more. Happy anniversary.
• You've been right about almost everything, and I'd like that kept between us.
• I promised better or worse. Nobody mentioned the way you load the dishwasher. Happy anniversary.
• Congratulations on staying married to someone who argues with the GPS. Happy anniversary.
• To a couple: You've been married so long you tell the same story in shifts. Happy anniversary.
• To a couple: I've seen you two try to hang a picture together, so I know this is real. Happy anniversary.
• We've reached the stage of marriage where "let's get out of here" means it's 8:45.
• Happy anniversary to the person who still asks what I want for dinner as if we've never met.
• To parents: You've been arguing about the way to Aunt ___'s house since before I was born. Happy anniversary.
• It's our anniversary. I've forgotten how many years, but you'll tell me.

What do you write when you missed the date? (belated anniversary wishes)

Say it's late once, and send it. Waiting doesn't improve anything. Researchers who study late gifts report that givers overrate the harm: in one online study of 903 people, recipients thought getting nothing was more likely to hurt a relationship than getting something up to two months late. Those were gifts, not cards, but you can take the point. The King's office gives up to six months to request a belated anniversary message. And you'd be in good company: in 1890, Olivia Clemens wrote to her mother that until she wrote the date, she hadn't remembered it was her wedding day.

• This card is late, and you're the least surprised person alive. Happy anniversary.
• I can tell you what you wore that day, what we ate and who cried. The date's the part I lost. Happy belated anniversary.
• We missed the day. We haven't missed anything else about you two. Happy belated anniversary.
• Consider this the first card of your next year. Belated congratulations.
• Belated happy anniversary. I've made up for it by telling everyone how late I was.
• To a spouse: I'd like to extend our anniversary by several days, starting with dinner tonight.
• The post office and I both apologize. Happy belated anniversary.
• It took me a few extra days to find the words, and these are the ones I found: I'm still glad it was you.

Christian anniversary wishes

These are for couples who'd want God in the card. If you're not sure, a verse on its own is an easy way to add one line without guessing at their faith. The US Catholic bishops also publish a couple's prayer for an anniversary of marriage.

• God has been good to this house, and you're the first thing I thank him for. Happy anniversary.
• We asked for God's blessing on our wedding day, and I've seen it in you every year since. Happy anniversary.
• We're praying for you two today and thanking God for what he's built between you.
• May the Lord keep you as close in the next ___ years as you've been in these. Happy anniversary.
• You've shown all of us what keeping a promise before God looks like. Happy anniversary.
• I'm grateful for every prayer we've said together, especially the ones at 3 a.m. Happy anniversary.
• May there always be one more chair in your house for whoever God sends next. Happy anniversary.
• Thank you for praying for me on the days I forgot to. Happy anniversary, my love.

Anniversary wishes by year

The traditional gift can make a good hook, since a card about tin at ten years writes itself. Our anniversary gifts by year page has the full list, including where the US and UK lists differ. Each wish group below has one for a spouse, one for family and one for friends, with a few extra at the 25th and 50th, the two years people search for most.

First anniversary wishes

Tolstoy's Levin, three months into marriage, was "happy, but not at all in the way he had expected to be." That's a first anniversary in a sentence, and it's the honest thing to write about: what turned out differently.

• Paper is the traditional first-anniversary gift, so here's my paper. One year in and I like you more than I expected, and I expected a lot.
• One year, and we've already forgotten what this family was like without you, ___. Happy first anniversary.
• Happy first anniversary. You've had your first fight about whose family gets Christmas, so you're officially married.

Fifth anniversary wishes

The fifth is the wood anniversary on the traditional list, and by now there's usually a house, a kid or a dog worth mentioning.

• Five years is the wood anniversary. I've never put down roots with anyone before you, and I don't plan to move.
• Five years in, and you've already got inside jokes the rest of us don't understand. Happy anniversary.
• Five years! I still remember the speeches. Happy anniversary to you both.

Tenth anniversary wishes

In Jane Eyre, Jane's closing chapter starts its accounting at exactly this mark: "I have now been married ten years."

• Ten years is tin, which seems low for everything you've put up with. Happy anniversary.
• A whole decade. We still remember you two dancing at the reception. Happy tenth.
• Ten years ago we ate your cake. We've been eating at your house ever since.

Fifteenth anniversary wishes

Emily Post wrote in 1922 that the paper, wooden and tin presents "are seldom anything but jokes" and that crystal "is the earliest that is likely to be taken seriously." That gives you a good line for the 15th.

• Emily Post said crystal is the first gift to take seriously. I started taking you seriously around year one. Happy anniversary.
• Fifteen years, and you two still sit on the same side of the booth. Happy anniversary.
• Fifteen years. You've now been married longer than you dated, held that first job and lived in that awful apartment combined.

Twentieth anniversary wishes

The twentieth is china on the traditional list. By now the couple has fed a lot of people, which gives you something to write about.

• Twenty years is china. We've gone through three sets of plates, and I'd eat off paper with you. Happy anniversary.
• Twenty years. The kids at your wedding have mortgages now. Happy anniversary.
• Twenty years of bringing each other a plate at every party. Some of us have started copying you. Happy anniversary.

25th anniversary wishes

Twenty-five years is the first anniversary most people call by a name. John Quincy Adams, writing in his diary on his 25th in 1822, noted that it was what the Germans called "the Silver Wedding." The fourth line below borrows from Mark Twain, who wrote in his notebook that "No man or woman really knows what perfect love is until they have been married a quarter of a century."

• Twenty-five years ago I had no idea what I was promising. I know now, and I'd sign again.
• Twenty-five years, Mom and Dad, and I was there for most of them. It looked like a lot of work and a lot of fun. Happy silver anniversary.
• A quarter of a century. You two have earned the silver and maybe a nap.
• Mark Twain said nobody knows what perfect love is until they've been married a quarter of a century. So now you know. Happy silver anniversary.

Thirtieth anniversary wishes

The thirtieth is pearl. Write about the small, repeated things, because after thirty years that's what the marriage is made of.

• Thirty years of your small daily kindnesses add up. Pearls get made the same way. Happy anniversary.
• Thirty years of hosting Thanksgiving. We've stopped pretending we'll take a turn. Happy anniversary.
• Happy thirtieth. I've run out of couples I can compare you to.

Fortieth anniversary wishes

The fortieth is ruby. Mention a story the whole family can recite, since the couple spent forty years making those.

• Forty years, and I still save you the last bite. Happy ruby anniversary.
• Forty years! Thank you for building the place we all come home to.
• Forty years of stories, and they get better every time. Some of them even happened.

50th anniversary wishes

A golden anniversary card is often read aloud, so write it for the room and include something the grandchildren haven't heard. Emily Post called the golden wedding "a quite sacred event," which the last line borrows. If you want something official for the day, there are two places you can request one, and a third that starts at the 60th.

• Fifty years ago I couldn't have pictured this. I'm glad it was you I got to find out with. Happy golden anniversary.
• Mom and Dad, your fifty years built every one of us. Happy golden anniversary.
• From a grandchild: Fifty years! I asked Grandpa for the secret, and he said to ask Grandma.
• Emily Post called the golden wedding "a quite sacred event." Knowing you two, I agree. Congratulations.

Sixtieth anniversary wishes

The sixtieth is diamond on modern lists, though older ones gave diamond to the 75th. In one analysis of 2018 data, 2 percent of married people had reached it, so write down something only the two of them would know.

• Sixty years, my love. Who else would remember all of it with me?
• Sixty years. There are people at this party who exist because of you. Happy diamond anniversary.
• Sixty years. I have no advice for you, and I'd like some.

What did real couples write on their anniversaries?

Real anniversary letters are shorter and funnier than you'd expect, and several of the writers were late or lost count. Here's what we could trace to the letters and diaries themselves, sorted by year of marriage. Spelling is theirs. Where an original used a dash, we've set a comma. No other list we read prints these, and each is here because the date and the occasion are in the source.

• 1st, 1843. Sophia Hawthorne to Nathaniel, in the diary they kept together: "Then we had visions & dreamed of Paradise. Now Paradise is here & our fairest visions stand realized before us." In his letter to her in the same diary, he said that putting their life into words was "like trying to dip up the ocean in a goblet." (The Morgan Library)
• 1st, 1847. Elizabeth Barrett Browning to a friend, on her spaniel, Flush: "we lost him, he ran away & stayed away all night, .. which was too bad, considering that it was our anniversary besides, & that he had no right to spoil it." (The Brownings' Correspondence)
• 1st, 1878. Mabel Bell to her mother-in-law, on the first-anniversary presents: "Alec bought the Adeline edition of the British poets in 52 volumes for me, and I gave him a new edition of Chambers encyclopeadia." That's a lot of paper. (Brantford Expositor)
• 3rd, 1873. Mark Twain to Olivia, alone in a New York hotel: "if our mutual satisfaction in it ... continues to grow as it has grown since 1870, we shall by & by become not merely the lovingest couple in the land but the happiest." (Mark Twain Project)
• About 11th, 1666. Samuel Pepys, in his diary: "So home to supper, and to bed, it being my wedding night, but how many years I cannot tell; but my wife says ten." A year before, he had written "my wedding day of ten years." (Pepys's diary)
• 10th, 1918. Winston Churchill to Clementine, from France: "They certainly have been the happiest years of my life, & never at any moment did I feel more profoundly and eternally attached to you." (International Churchill Society)
• 11th, 1919. Clementine Churchill to Winston: "You took me from the straitened little by-path I was treading and took me with you into the life and colour and jostle of the high-way." (International Churchill Society)
• 13th, 1777. Abigail Adams to John, while he served in Congress: "This day dearest of Friends compleats 13 years since we were solemly united in wedlock; 3 years of the time we have been cruelly seperated." (Massachusetts Historical Society)
• 16th, 1935. Harry Truman to Bess: "This is the day sixteen years ago that I made a plunge and took a chance for which I have been a better man. My only regret is that it was not done ten years sooner." (Pendergast Years transcription)
• 18th, 1782. Abigail Adams to John, in Europe negotiating peace: "Eighteen years have run their anual Circuit, since we pledged our mutual Faith to each other, and the Hymeneal torch was Lighted at the Alter of Love. Yet, yet it Burns with unabating fervour." (Massachusetts Historical Society)
• 20th, 1890. Olivia Clemens to her mother: "Until I wrote the date… I had not remembered that this is my wedding day." (Twain's Geography)
• 21st, 1861. Queen Victoria to her uncle, on Albert: "Very few can say with me that their husband at the end of twenty-one years is not only full of the friendship, kindness, and affection which a truly happy marriage brings with it, but the same tender love of the very first days of our marriage!" Albert died that December. (Letters of Queen Victoria)
• 25th, 1822. Louisa Adams to John Quincy, at her driest: "take it all in all we have probably done as well as our neighbours, and have been as much blessed as mortals usually are who cannot pretend to any extraordinary degree of perfection." He wrote to her the same day: "More than a half of your life and nearly half of mine have we travelled hand in hand in our pilgrimage through this valley, not alone of tears." (Shannon Selin)
• 25th, 1895. Olivia Clemens to her sister, with the family deep in debt: "Mr. Clemens called me back and took out a five-franc piece and gave it to me, saying: 'It is our silver-wedding day, and so I give you a present.'" (Paine's biography of Twain)
• 31st, 1983. Ronald Reagan to Nancy, aboard Air Force One: "Still this is the day, the day that marks 31 years of such happiness as comes to few men." (Country Living, printing the letter)
• 35th, 1799. John Adams to Abigail, on a date he could also call the anniversary of George III's accession: "This is Accession day you know. I shall always consider it as a red Letter day: a fortunate day." He signed it, "I am as for 35 years I have been." (Adams Papers)
• 35th, 1887. Rutherford B. Hayes, in his diary: "For us it should be and is a happy day. Rarely occurs a happier union than ours." (Diary and Letters, vol. 4)
• 38th, 1957. Harry Truman to Bess, the list at the top of this post, including "All cut up but still happy." (National Archives)
• 40th, 1948. Winston Churchill to Clementine: "My Beloved, I send this token, but how little can it express my gratitude to you for making my life and any work I have done possible, and for giving me so much happiness in a world of accident & storm." (Christian Science Monitor)
• 48th, 1845. John Quincy Adams, in his diary: "The thread has been of checkered yarn. Altogether, my lot has been a happy one upon earth." (Memoirs, vol. 12)
• 49th, 1994. George H. W. Bush to Barbara: "Will you marry me? Oops, I forgot, you did that 49 years ago today! I was very happy on that day in 1945, but I am even happier today." (Pearls of Wisdom, printed in the Daily Mail; TODAY has him reading it and gives the 1994 date)

Anniversary poems you're free to copy

Poems published before 1931 are in the US public domain, so you can write them in a card or print them on a gift. Poets get quoted out of context a lot, so each note below says what the poem is really about. Where an original used a dash, we've set a comma.

Anniversary poems for your husband

Both of these work in a wife's hand, and Bradstreet's was written to her own husband.

• "If ever two were one, then surely we." Anne Bradstreet, To My Dear and Loving Husband, 1678. She wrote it to her husband, Simon.
• "That I did always love, / I bring thee proof: / That till I loved / I did not love enough." Emily Dickinson, as first printed in 1890. Her editors changed the last line, and her own manuscript reads "I never lived."

Anniversary poems for your wife

Start with Bishop's, which a husband wrote to his wife on their anniversary.

• "If she, by merit since disclosed, / Prove twice the woman I supposed, / I plead that double merit now, / To justify a double vow." Samuel Bishop, written to his wife Mary with a ring on their anniversary. The 1796 text says fourteen years, and earlier printings say sixteen.
• "Why, having won her, do I woo?" Coventry Patmore, The Married Lover, 1856. Stop at this line. The poem goes on to compare her to a queen.
• "Age cannot wither her, nor custom stale / Her infinite variety." Shakespeare, Antony and Cleopatra. It's a soldier talking about Cleopatra, and it's still a fine compliment after thirty years.

Anniversary poems for either of you

None of these assume who's writing to whom.

• "I love thee to the level of everyday's / Most quiet need, by sun and candlelight." Elizabeth Barrett Browning, Sonnet 43, 1850. Skip the famous opening. This is the line for a long marriage.
• "Grow old along with me! / The best is yet to be, / The last of life, for which the first was made." Robert Browning, Rabbi Ben Ezra, 1864. The speaker is a medieval rabbi on age and faith, so it isn't a marriage poem, but it suits a card anyway.
• "Love's not Time's fool, though rosy lips and cheeks / Within his bending sickle's compass come." Shakespeare, Sonnet 116, 1609. A poem about constancy, not about a wedding.
• "For thy sweet love remember'd such wealth brings / That then I scorn to change my state with kings." Shakespeare, Sonnet 29, 1609. The sonnet opens in disgrace, so it's the one for a hard year.
• "Only our love hath no decay; / This, no to morrow hath, nor yesterday." John Donne, The Anniversarie, 1633. It marks a year since they first saw each other, not a wedding, and the spelling is his.
• "Of love, that says not mine and thine, / But ours, for ours is thine and mine." Henry Wadsworth Longfellow, The Hanging of the Crane, 1874. The poem follows one home from a wedding to its golden anniversary.
• "Shall we stick by each other as long as we live?" Walt Whitman, Song of the Open Road, 1856. It's addressed to a comrade rather than a spouse, and the line works alone.

Anniversary quotes, with their sources

Every quote here links to a source we could check, usually the book itself. We didn't see that on the anniversary lists we read. Lines from novels are lines from characters, so we've said who's talking. For more of this, try our family quotes and Valentine poems.

Quotes about a long marriage

These are about staying married, so they suit an anniversary better than a wedding.

• "What greater thing is there for two human souls than to feel that they are joined for life, to strengthen each other in all labour, to rest on each other in all sorrow, to minister to each other in all pain, to be one with each other in silent unspeakable memories at the moment of the last parting?" George Eliot, narrating Adam Bede, 1859. Most lists cut it at "joined for life."
• "that complete union which makes the advancing years a climax, and age the harvest of sweet memories in common." George Eliot, Middlemarch, 1871-72.
• "And at home by the fire, whenever you look up, there I shall be, and whenever I look up there will be you." Gabriel Oak proposing in Thomas Hardy's Far from the Madding Crowd, 1874. She turns him down at first.
• "Theirs was that substantial affection which arises (if any arises at all) when the two who are thrown together begin first by knowing the rougher sides of each other's character, and not the best till further on." Hardy again, same novel, at the end.
• "I know what it is to live entirely for and with what I love best on earth." Jane, in Charlotte Brontë's Jane Eyre, 1847.
• "for there is nothing better in this world than that man and wife should be of one mind in a house." Odysseus, in Samuel Butler's translation of The Odyssey, 1900.
• "we throve together, and have ever mutually endeavored to make each other happy." Benjamin Franklin on his wife, Deborah, Autobiography.
• "No man or woman really knows what perfect love is until they have been married a quarter of a century." Mark Twain, Notebook, written 1894 and published 1935.
• "Wheresoever she was, THERE was Eden." Adam, in Mark Twain's Eve's Diary, 1906, written after Olivia's death.
• "Grief can take care of itself; but to get the full value of a joy you must have somebody to divide it with." Mark Twain, Following the Equator, 1897. Lists usually drop the grief half.
• "A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person." Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic's Notebook, 1966.
• "But let there be spaces in your togetherness." Kahlil Gibran, The Prophet, 1923.

Dry ones, for couples who'd laugh

These aren't flattering, and the right couple will love them.

• "A good marriage, if there be any such, rejects the company and conditions of love, and tries to represent those of friendship." Michel de Montaigne, Essays, in Charles Cotton's translation.
• "Marriage is one long conversation, chequered by disputes." Robert Louis Stevenson, Memories and Portraits, 1887.
• "In entering on a marriage one should ask one's self the question, 'Do you think you will pass your time well with this woman till your old age?'" Friedrich Nietzsche, Human, All-Too-Human, in Helen Zimmern's translation, under the heading "Marriage as a Long Talk."

Famous lines with more behind them

Three lines that appear on wedding programs and anniversary cards everywhere, with the context the cards leave out. They're still yours to use, and it's good to know.

• "Life has taught us that love does not consist in gazing at each other but in looking outward together in the same direction." Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, Wind, Sand and Stars, 1939. The chapter is about comrades in a war, not couples.
• "What will survive of us is love." Philip Larkin, An Arundel Tomb. The line before it hedges: "Our almost-instinct almost true."
• "I married you because you gave me a promise." Mrs. Antrobus in Thornton Wilder's play The Skin of Our Teeth, 1942, said as her husband is announcing he's leaving her.

Which anniversary quotes are credited to the wrong person?

A lot of them. Check before you print a name on something you're giving. These turn up on anniversary lists, and each row shows what the evidence says. (Mignon McLaughlin's line above does hold up.)

Lists also credit Jane Austen with lines written for the film versions of her novels, including a declaration Mr. Darcy makes only in the 2005 movie. They aren't in the book's text, so check before you print one.

Which Bible verses suit an anniversary card?

The King James Bible never uses the word anniversary, so every verse on a card is an adaptation, and some are stretched further than others. These are all from the KJV, linked to the passage.

• "Set me as a seal upon thine heart, as a seal upon thine arm: for love is strong as death." Song of Solomon 8:6. Lovers speaking, so the fit is real. The next clause is "jealousy is cruel as the grave," which cards tend to skip.
• "Many waters cannot quench love, neither can the floods drown it." Song of Solomon 8:7. A good one after a hard year.
• "My beloved is mine, and I am his." Song of Solomon 2:16. Nothing in the context undercuts it.
• "I found him whom my soul loveth." Song of Solomon 3:4. The speaker is a woman, so it's a wife's line to her husband.
• "Two are better than one; because they have a good reward for their labour." Ecclesiastes 4:9. It's about work and companionship, and it never names a spouse.
• "Live joyfully with the wife whom thou lovest." Ecclesiastes 9:9. The whole verse says life is brief, so enjoy her anyway.
• "And Jacob served seven years for Rachel; and they seemed unto him but a few days, for the love he had to her." Genesis 29:20. Lovely on time passing. Don't read ahead to verse 25.
• "Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies." Proverbs 31:10. Fits a 40th, the ruby year.
• "Charity suffereth long, and is kind." 1 Corinthians 13:4. The KJV says charity, and "love is patient" comes from modern translations. Paul was writing to a church.
• "What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder." Mark 10:9. It's an answer to a question about divorce, and familiar from weddings.

Four popular ones say something other than what the card means:

How many couples reach a 25th or 50th anniversary?

A little over half of Americans who first married in the early 1970s had reached a 25th anniversary, and about half a 35th. Among those who married in 1970-74, 54.8 percent of men and 52.3 percent of women had reached a 25th, and 50.0 and 46.6 percent a 35th, in 2014 Census survey data. That's first marriages only, and it counts people alive to answer.

We couldn't find a clean figure for the 50th. The number you'll see, "only 5 or 6 percent," answers a different question. Census found that 6.2 percent of women who were married at the time of its 2009 survey had passed a 50th, and an analysis of 2018 data found 8 percent of married people had, with 41 percent past a 25th and 2 percent past a 60th. Those groups include people married last year, who couldn't have reached 50, so neither number is the share of marriages that get there. The median marriage in progress is about 20 years old, which is its age so far, not how long it will last.

What is the longest marriage on record?

The longest marriage ever is 88 years and 349 days, on Guinness's record page, and few couples will get close. Its record page gives that length for the longest marriage ever between a man and a woman, David and Sarah Hiller, from 1809 to 1898. At its November 2025 verification, the longest for a living couple was Lyle and Eleanor Gittens of Miami, at 83 years and 153 days.

What do people get wrong about long marriages and anniversaries?

Most of the numbers repeated about long marriages are older, narrower or less certain than they sound. So keep them out of the card unless you've checked, and a joke stays a joke. These are the common ones, with what's known.

How do you get a White House card for a 50th anniversary?

Use the White House greetings form, which lists Wedding Anniversary as an occasion with year options of 25th, 50th and 51+, and allow at least six weeks. The form states no lead time. The six weeks comes from congressional offices publishing older White House guidance, which also limits greetings to the 50th and later and to US citizens, and rules have shifted between administrations. Two other offices will mark a long marriage too:

Where did silver and golden anniversaries come from?

Silver and golden weddings came into English from Germany in the 1800s. TIME's history finds the evidence more solid by the 18th century, in German culture, where friends might give the wife a silver wreath at 25 years and a gold one at 50. A standard German etymology dates the word Silberhochzeit to the 18th century, and John Quincy Adams, in 1822, still explained it in his diary as "what the Germans call" the Silver Wedding.

In an 1850 novel, an English character says he's never heard of one. By 1881, an American manual had a whole sequence, from paper at one year to diamond at 75. Emily Post listed eight in 1922, and the word itself is much older: anniversary dates to about 1200, when it mostly meant the yearly return of a death or a saint's martyrdom. The cheerful sense came later.

What should you give with an anniversary card?

Give something that keeps the card's one true thing around after the card's in a drawer. If you want the traditional material, our anniversary gifts by year has the whole list, with gift ideas for the first 12 years, the 25th and the 50th, and what we make matches some of them honestly. Our jigsaw puzzle is printed on paper and laminated to chipboard, so it's a real paper gift. Our gallery-wrapped canvas is stretched over a 1.25 inch wooden frame, which makes it a wood gift. For a 25th, our engraved portrait pendant comes in solid sterling silver.

The gift we'd pick for most years is a portrait of the two of them. From one photo of the couple, our couple and family portraits paint them in an art style, as a framed canvas, canvas or puzzle. You see a watermarked proof before you pay, nothing prints until you approve it, and the photo is deleted within 24 hours. If you need a photo to work from, our couple poses can help, and we've also got ideas for anniversary gifts for parents and gifts for couples.

Anniversary wishes in Spanish

If you're writing to Spanish-speaking family, here are a few that say it plainly. Spanish names the milestones too: the RAE dictionary gives bodas de plata for 25 years, bodas de oro for 50, bodas de diamante for 60 and bodas de platino for 75. One caution: in Portuguese, aniversário means birthday as well as anniversary, so a bare feliz aniversário can read as happy birthday to a Brazilian mother-in-law.

• Feliz aniversario, mi amor. Contigo hasta los martes me gustan.
• Feliz aniversario a los dos. Que cumplan muchos años más juntos.
• Mamá y papá, gracias por enseñarnos cómo se quiere. Feliz aniversario.
• Feliz aniversario a nuestro hijo y a nuestra nuera. Nos llena de alegría verlos tan unidos.
• Feliz aniversario a nuestra hija y a nuestro yerno. Nos encanta verlos tan felices.
• Felicidades por sus bodas de plata. Veinticinco años, y da gusto verlos juntos.
• Felicidades por sus bodas de oro. Cincuenta años de ejemplo para toda la familia.
• Que Dios los siga bendiciendo. Feliz aniversario de bodas.

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